A contest was held
To win eMetrics ticket
Winning Haiku here
eMetrics Haiku
Came pouring in this season
All hoping to win
From London, Zurich
Ljubljana, Slovenia
UK and Brazil
Some were beautiful
Some were educational
Best presented here
Some got attention
For classic use of season
Autumn comes again
Regress slowly to their mean
Like leaves in autumn
Industry latest
Adobiture mentioned twice
1.8 billion
The last year of Omniture.
They’re at #eMetrics.
Web analytics
A cry in the wilderness
Likely solution
A differentiator
Why don’t they see it?
eMetrics helps us
Travel the difficult path
Through data to truth
Vanity tested
Who says thy name is woman?
I am most flattered
at this measurement mecca
sterne’s team works magic
Flattery plus scale
Impressive combination
Worthy of notice
I submit to thee my humble submission, for review by thy honorable eyes…
Oh where art thou my,
elusive analytics
of web visitors?
look how I beckon
thee, for thy ghastly insight
to convince HiPPos!
I sit and measure,
then twitch and search forever,
to finally find…
core nuggets of gold,
in recent emails of mine…
chance! a stroke of luck!
Jim Sterne gives a-way!
a free pass to the summit
to D.C. he say!
Web Gurus galore!
all the optimization,
networking, and more!
Certification
tests are calling from afar
thou must come hither!
by plane, train, or car?
No! by eMetrics Haikus
I reach for thy star!
No trade shows for you, they say
I sneak in again
Fog over Twin Peaks
ROI on PPC
Emetrics beckons
Up and to the right
Google says this; I believe
Still, I must segment
ROI metrics
PPC? Now optimized
I ♥ Emetrics
Oh site visitors
Won’t you stay, perchance convert?
Bounce they go like balls
The data directs
No more gut-based marketing
Just test it, silly
I: A/B tested
She: So multivariate
We: Need a Jim Sterne
Many visitors
Why are you all so bouncy?
Bad navigation
Emetrics Summit
Big brains, so enlightening
Now I’m optimized
A difficult choice
Some Haiku so very good
Only one can win
requires brain, not software –
reality check
flowing through the spiders web
watching drips
catch and release, catch again
streaming to the sea
One Haiku rings true
Captures conceptual soul
Feels like love poem
On a server, a light blinks
I know you were here
Some Some submitted late
By speakers who have tickets
All a gift of verse
Heart-felt ambition:
Provoke collegial verse.
Supreme achievement

